Category Archives: Self-Awareness

A Good Mentor is a Gift from the Gods

Kristin Luna Motivation Superstars Writing Seminars The Writing Life No Comments

I tend to be a stubborn person. When I think I have the right answer, or have a certain strategy planned out, it takes a lot of effort to get me to budge. But when I don’t have an answer, and have no idea which way to turn, I am all ears for suggestions and guidance. I ask those I love and respect what they would do and what they think I should do. Ultimately, I lay my own path, but it helps to know how others would handle something or have handled something before I make my move.

I’ve mostly gone to my father for advice. I consider him wise, knowledgeable of the world, caring, and kind. He is both ethical and moral, and not to mention understanding. In a lot of situations, Dad’s got the answer.

Except when it comes to becoming an author for the simple reason that he is not an author.

In most cultural pasts, apprenticeships were the chosen method of learning a specific craft. With the steady and knowledgeable hand of an expert, a young apprentice learned the skill by spending all day in the shadow of his mentor. Now, a more equatable term would be internship, although the learning is not quite as exhaustive (and “apprenticeship” sounds a bit more shiny, doesn’t it?).

When learning a specific craft now, we have a few options. We go to college or a trade school, intensive seminars, or procure an internship position. Or, we might be blessed with a gift from the heavens: a mentor.

A mentor is someone who has great knowledge of a specific item or skill and has accepted the responsibility of passing that information on (hopefully to you). Some famous mentor/mentoree relationships of note include: Mahatma Gandhi mentor to Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. and Nelson Mandela; Ralph Waldo Emerson mentor to Henry David Thoreau; and probably the most famous, Socrates mentor to Plato.  Some mentors have already passed, and their writings are used as a means to mentor others. One of my favorite accounts of a mentor/mentoree relationship is captured in the book Letters to a Young Poet by Rainer Maria Rilke. I highly recommend this book to everyone.

The best part of having a mentor, for me at least, is that I have someone in my life who is living the life that I want to eventually live. They have put in the hard work, and it is a truly inspiring thing to see. I met my mentor at Superstars Writing Seminar, knowing I needed a mentor but wasn’t actively seeking someone out for the role. Fate delivered (Thanks, fate!), and I met and connected with one of the instructors. He is not only my mentor in writing, but he is a best friend, a confidant, and someone with whom I look forward to sharing my successes, my failures, and my hopes and dreams.

There is a caveat. Oh yes, always a caveat. A mentor can only guide you and tell you where he or she has been. A mentor cannot tell you exactly what you need to do and where you need to go (that’s a dictator). While this is the caveat, let it also be your comfort. Your journey will not look like your mentor’s. There are many roads to success, and yours will not look like anyone else’s. However, it sure is nice having someone holding your hand along with way, giving advice and care when you need it most.

 

 

The Solitary Life of a Writer

Business Conventions Guest Posts Motivation 2 Comments

A guest post by Heidi Wilde.

As soon as I discovered the existence of books and realized that human beings wrote these precious passports to lands unknown, I knew that I wanted to be a writer.  The span between that realization and the present day I like to call My Rationalized Life (sounds better than My Wasted Life, don’t you think?).  A little over two years ago, I decided that if I was ever going to be a writer I needed to get serious.

At first I thought that becoming a writer would involve a lot of time locked in my room, alone.  That I needed to sequester myself away from “real life” in order to get in touch with my Writer Self.  It’s a romantic notion, and you do need focused, concentrated time for your writing, but I found that merely sitting alone with my laptop wasn’t getting me very far.  I started looking online for inspiration, tips, advice and stumbled into the world of Conventions and Workshops and all manner of Enticing Gatherings.

I try not to do anything in half measures and my first foray into this strange land was no different.  I found a workshop that was held in conjunction with Dragon*Con and involved submitting a short story or the first chapter of a manuscript to the author who was running the 3 day workshop.  It popped my eyes wide open, let me tell you.  It also introduced me to the idea that writing is a community effort.  Yes, when it comes down to it, the only one who can tell your story is you, but we aren’t meant to walk the path from inspiration to fruition alone.

My second convention experience was attending LTUE (Life, the Universe, and Everything – a speculative fiction symposium) where I became acquainted with a group of people who were interested in forming a writing group.  I’d never had a writing group and I was a little nervous about how it would all work.  I mean, these people would expect me to submit my writing.  I would be expected to critique theirs! It was all very new and scary to me, so of course I jumped aboard.

In the beginning these people were strangers.  They held no familial obligation to tell me my writing was good.  They were going to give me what they wanted me to give them in return; honesty and ways to improve.  If you aren’t currently in a writing group and have any interest in publishing – or at the very least improving – your work, I highly recommend finding a group.

There are a few things to consider when you begin searching for a group.  First, you need to figure out what you want to get out of being in a group.  Do you have a few projects that are nearly finished? Just need those extra set of eyes?  Do you want to develop better critiquing skills?  Do you need moral support for your writing addiction?  A place where people speak your language?  Know what you want/need so you can communicate those things to prospective groups.

Every group dynamic will be different; you need to find the one that fits you best.  Trust me when I tell you you don’t want a group whose only feedback is that everything you write is awesome.  This may sound like a good thing, and at times we do need to cosset our egos, but how much will you improve if you’re never told how or what needs improving?  On the flip side, you should avoid groups that make you contemplate suicide at the end of each session. Moderation in all things, right?  This is just as applicable to writing groups as to anything else.  Find a group where you feel safe to submit, but also challenged to improve.

Don’t forget, writing groups are as much about what you can offer the rest of the group as they are about what you can gain from them.  Make sure you are willing to read other people’s submissions and give them your honest feedback.  Again, moderation.  Don’t hang in the shadows for too long, but don’t expect that the spotlight is there just for you.

Be sure you are ready to accept and (where you deem appropriate) apply criticism. Once you have decided what story you want to tell, listen to your group’s comments to make sure you are telling the story you want to be.  There is no need to make every change suggested by your group (that is one good way to lose your story), but if you hear the same comment from multiple sources you need to pay attention.  A problem area is being highlighted.  Somewhere along the way what you meant to say and what you actually said became two different things.  Whether or not you use any suggestions you receive on how to fix the problem, the section needs to be fixed.

In addition to writing groups, I found that attending seminars and workshops help your craft as well as get you out mingling with people “in the know”.  Yes, I’m talking about networking, rubbing shoulders, brushing elbows, playing footsie.  No matter how nervous the idea of actually speaking to other people may make you, it is a very important piece of the pie.

The best experiences I have had with this aspect of writing have been during Superstars Writing Seminars.  I could write a long post full of effusive praise for this seminar, but since this post is already quite lengthy, I’ll just mention one thing.  This is where the budding thought of community that I received at the Dragon*Con workshop and watered during LTUE fully bloomed and bore fruit.  Never in my wildest dreams did I image Superstars such as Kevin J. Anderson, Brandon Sanderson, Rebecca Moesta, Dave Farland, Tracy Hickman, Eric Flint and James Owen would claim me as a member of their Tribe, but they did.

Of the millions of things these wonderful authors said that touched me, the one that really changed my outlook on this business of writing was when Kevin told us to look around at the rest of the attendees.  “These people are not your competition; they are your comrades.”  Build your Tribe.  Work on your writing, of course, but especially develop strong relationships with your fellow writers, editors, publishers, agents – and yes, even those I.P. attorneys (hey, we all need love) and you’ll find fulfillment and success in this insane, scary, wonderful world of writing.

Heidi Wilde Bio: Me in the Scots Tower
Heidi A. Wilde is a Respiratory Therapist by night and aspiring author by day.  She spends her nights dragging people back from the brink of death, but she has dedicated her daylight hours to the pursuit of all things writing.  Current projects include a Children’s “How to” Poetry book, a Regency romance series as well as a foray into the realm of Steampunk.  She attributes the bulk of what knowledge she can claim to attendance in fabulous programs such as Superstars Writing Seminars, Dave Farland’s workshops and various conventions.

Get Your Fanny Out There!

Business Conventions Motivation Quincy Allen 2 Comments

I used to have a friend—a good one—and that friendship ended recently. It’s a rather long, sordid tale about politics and methods and appearances and styles and plans and… well, a lot of things. And mostly, it has to do with how each of those applies to a burgeoning writing career. Put simply, he and I are on different paths. We’re both committed to those paths. And we came to verbal blows as a result of those paths. Truth be told, we’re no longer friends for a lot of reasons. I’m telling you about the loss of a friend because of how strongly I feel about networking. Our difference of opinion on the subject isn’t why we’re no longer friends, but it was at least one nail in the coffin.

Ultimately, as entertainers (and we absolutely are), the only way we’re going to be successful is for people with disposable incomes to know who we are. And the only way we’re going to stay successful is to ensure that they never forget us—in a positive light, I might add. So how do you do that? Well, I can give you an example of how I got invited to participate in this really fantastic group of writers called the Fictorians—a move that was frowned upon by some. It all started with the Superstars writing seminar. If you’re a writer, you should look that one up. While I was there, I made an effort to meet people and talk with them. I asked what they wrote and how their careers were coming along. They returned the query. Friendships were borne, and not long after they asked me to write a post for them. And one thing led to another… and another.

And now, here I am, a virtual unknown writer who is lucky enough to have you reading his words because of that seminar and the simple process of networking.

The same goes for conventions and conferences. Attend them. (Note the imperative.) And while you’re there, meet and greet as many people as you can. Get to know them. Make them more than acquaintances. TALK to them about who they are and what they’re working on. And be a good listener.

I need to caveat this.

We’re writers, which means that many (most?) of us are introverts who really do prefer spending time at home in a quiet room while we chain words together than we do going to cotillions. It’s the nature of the beast. I have three words for you: GET OVER IT. And do so in, like, the next 4 seconds.  I know that sounds flippant, but the biggest and best free (or nearly so) thing you can do to advance your career is to go out and introduce yourself to the writing community. Let them get to know you. And in that process, you’ll meet fans, you’ll develop contacts, and you’ll get invited to participate in things that help getting your name out there… or vice versa.

My girlfriend uses the phrase “creative sanga” where peoples of like-minded endeavors get together and are subsequently capable of creating things greater than the sum of their parts… or something like that.

It’s not B.S.

The writing community isn’t that large, and it’s full of really amazing people from all walks of life. Discover who they are. This is what business people call networking. I’ve come to refer to it as making friends, and when it comes right down to it, there’s little of the successes I continue to have in my career that aren’t as a direct result of this process.

And while you’re at it, introduce yourself to me. Friend me upon Facebook or Twitter. Look me up at the next convention I’m at. Give me the opportunity to get to know you. I can think of no better way for us to make our ways through this mortal coil as we pursue our writing careers.

It is a dream I have.

Being Creative While Working a Full-Time Job

Business Guest Posts Motivation Superstars Writing Seminars The Writing Life 4 Comments

A guest post by Nick Ruva.

One piece of advice you will hear repeatedly as you embark on a writing career is, “Don’t quit your day job.” Many of us know that all too well. Either you do not make enough as a writer to pay the bills, or you need the security of a consistent paycheck and those much appreciated health benefits. Whatever your reason may be, trying to squeeze in your writing time while working a full-time job can be difficult. It is harder if you are working a job that challenges you to find creative solutions to problems. I cannot prescribe a way to squeeze more time out of your day to write. I am a staunch believer in the idea that when we say we do not have time to write, what we are really saying is there are other things we would rather spend our time on. I get that, and by all means if you would rather spend time unwinding after a long day by watching the tube or shooting baddies online, I cannot blame you. I have been there a million times. When I was asked to write an article about working a job that consumes you night and day, but still finding time to write, I had to sit down and think about it. Sure, I am busy often, and I work some long hours, but at the end of my day I still have time I could be writing, but sometimes I mentally cannot. I have found that there is a limit to the creative output I can muster in a day. Some nights all I want to do is flop on the couch and nullify my brain watching TV. The trick for me has been finding a balance.

I work as a Configuration Management Engineer, which is a fancy way of saying I manage the automated building and release of software. My job requires me to research and solve complicated problems. We need a product to build faster, or a process improved so it is more stable or does something else. It is a job where you are constantly being presented with a problem and asked to find a fast and elegant solution. It is a lot like creative writing, and it ticks a lot the same creative pleasure centers in the brain. Over the years I have had several jobs that did not challenge me, such as my early years in retail, or doing simplistic quality assurance testing. Now, some QA testers need to be deviously creative, but my stint was ticking boxes on a checklist as either pass or fail. Do this, record result, repeat. I would not say it was mind-numbing, but it did make me desire to be more creative during my downtime. As the skill and creativity necessary for my day job increased, my writing productivity took a hit. Again, it was not for a lack of time. I have the time to write, and I feel guilty if I am not working on a story, but finding the drive when I am already creatively satiated during the day means I need to use other criteria to motivate me. So what do you do if you find yourself in a similar situation?

The first thing I would recommend is to reach out and meet other writers. Writing groups can be incredibly helpful. While at the University of Southern California, I took a few creative writing courses which allowed me to meet other writers on campus and establish critique groups with other newbie writers. After school, I went to a few local bookstores and looked for fliers for writing groups in the area. I am still in a group thanks to a post I found years ago. Likewise, I have met writers online and at classes and workshops, and we have created an online critique group that is still in its infancy, but is already having a huge effect on my writing. A good writing group will help you on so many levels. First, and maybe most important for us busy folks, a writing group will encourage you to write more. I feel extremely guilty if I do not bring something to my critique groups, and shame writing is still writing. If that is what you need to motivate you, I am right there with you.

A critique group also offers a network of writers you can grow and learn from. I have received some amazing critiques over the years, and my writing gets stronger every time I submit. For instance, I had a horrible tendency to write characters who stare. They would stare at everything and everyone, and it drove someone in my critique group up the wall. Looking back over my work, it was a pattern, and a problem, that I have corrected. Likewise, I like my fiction sparse, but that’s a fine line to walk, and if I submit a piece and get too many “white room” comments, I know I have not gotten the balance right. The writers in my critique groups have been instrumental in making me a better writer.

Just meeting and being around other writers can be an enormous help. My writer friends and I like to commiserate and daydream about writing. It helps when you have an all-consuming job, especially if you can talk with other writers in similar situations. If you’re having trouble meeting writers locally, I recommend the more networking heavy seminars, such as the Superstars Writing Seminar. Superstars, and other seminars like it, throw you in an incubator with around fifty other writers. Thanks to social networking sites, we have kept in touch and continue to help promote and nurture each other’s work. Seeing status updates from other writers, yes, even those: “I just wrote 5,000 words this morning,” that shame me into writing, are wonderful motivators. When you are feeling burned out, and all you want to do is click yourself numb on the Internet, having some streaming encouragement definitely helps.

I know what you are thinking. I am telling you the way I find more time to write is by hanging out in writing groups, meeting other writers, and going online to Facebook. OK, so, those are motivators, but what about actually writing. For me, it is trying to find the right mix of time to productivity. I have tried to schedule daily writing times. Early morning before work, during a lunch break, right after work, before bed. When I try to make a set schedule, especially at a set time, I normally start strong and fail miserably in a few days. The biggest issue I have is making the time to write when I am actually feeling inspired. If I am feeling especially creative, and I am excited about a story, I will fly through a couple thousand words. If I am feeling tired, or forced to write, I will resist even opening my manuscript.

I am also leery of setting daily word count goals. I know they work for many of my writer friends, but if I set a goal for a thousand words a day, I will probably slack off thinking, “I can do that in an hour. I’ll just bang out a few paragraphs before bed.” Never happens. If I am crunching, for say NaNoWriMo, I will do hourly goals. For instance, instead of shooting for a thousand words a day, I will force myself to it sit down for two hours and set a goal of five hundred words an hour. Something about moving the goal up and making it smaller, and more immediate, helps me stay accountable. It is not perfect, and sometimes I will balk at that two-hour window, but it helps. For the most part, I am against the writing word count goals as they normally make me less productive, and I sometimes feel defeated if I miss too many in a row.

What has worked for me was creating a little leeway for creative time during the day. I know this may not work for everyone, and maybe you can schedule a solid block of time and work like a champ, but if you are like me, do not feel guilty stopping your daily work here or there for a few minutes to write a paragraph of fiction when you’re inspired. I started doing that a few years ago, and barring a meeting or a catastrophe at work, I can usually find fifteen or twenty-minutes each day to work on some prose. I have also found that it energizes me when I return to my day job, especially if I am stumped on a particularly hard problem, or if I am simply not in the mood to be 100% productive for the nine to five. Completing a few writing goals has worked wonders and I have hammered out a few solid short stories recently on work breaks that have gone over well in my critique groups. Again, your mileage will vary, and make sure that your writing does not jeopardize your day to day. I know how easy it can be to get lost in your writing and lose a few hours of time. You need to find that balance, but I have found writing during my day as a great tool that has made me more productive in my day job and my writing life.

Finally, you need to ask why you are doing this. Over the past year I have been putting my writing life into better perspective. I look at myself as a small business owner, and my writing as a product I need to ready for release. Every time I skip a writing session, or get nothing done for the day, I am pushing my release date out. If I want to get my product on the shelf, I have to put in consistent work. You need to find that big, juicy carrot to dangle in order to keep you motivated even when there is a full DVR to distract you. For me it is simply to write when inspiration hits. I cannot count on having an hour of quality brain-time later. If I can put things on pause for a few, write that scene, and then go on about my day I am that much closer to my finished product.

Nick Ruva Bio:
Nick Ruva is a literary writer who dabbles in Sci-Fi and Fantasy. While he is not practicing the dark arts of fiction, he manages the release and build process of software products and specializes in process control and automation. A Los Angeles transplant, Nick has worked with local LA writers, editors and publishers who are working to promote the independent L.A. writing and arts scene. Nick is a Superstars Writing Seminars alum, David Farland Death Camp survivor, and was a member of the inaugural Writing Excuses “Out of Excuses” Retreat.